A totally credible study by totally credible online gaming site OnlineCasino.ca (no, we’re not linking) alleges that future gamers will look like hunchbacked, pale, “PlayStation Thumb”-afflicted creatures.
Tied to the inclusion of a video game disorder as definied by the World Health Organisation, the study presents “Michael, a visual representation of the future gamer.”
“From sleep deprivation and dehydration, to lack of vitamin D, digital eye strain, and ‘PlayStation thumb’ — these are just some of the physical implications of spending hours online, in a gaming chair, away from sunlight and physical activity,” a post on the Daily Mail reads.
The report laughing says gamers will develop a hunchback from gaming, a dent in their skulls from headphones, bald patches and grey skin due to a lack of sunlight, “Nintendo arthritis” and “PlayStation Thumb” due to controller use and more.
Frankly, the report is bullshit; don’t try to read anything into it, and just have a laugh at Michael, above. And let’s then move on, eh?